Hot Cheetoes Are My Life

I love Hot Cheetos. 

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I really do. Who doesn’t love the sizzle of chemicals messing with your brain? Isn’t it the best? You know, in many ways, Life is like a bag of Cheetos. I’m not going to list those ways. I just wanted to include a really cool analogy. But, it’s kinda self explanatory, isn’t it? Life has its ups and downs, which could be so easily explained with a rollercoaster, but I’m kinda stuck with this Cheeto analogy. Agh. This isn’t a very hot topic for discussion. Heh, still got it.

So, of course, there’s that brief moment of annoyance when you open the bag and it’s half full.

It’s not as bad as that moment when you’re eating hot cheetoes and you swallow one wrong, and then the whole world just

Fire Breathing Mythical Dragon via Wili Hybird and Eddi Van W. PC to Beverly and Pack.

But it’s still pretty annoying when you’re just left hanging, like, WHO ATE THE OTHER HALF? LET ME AT ‘EM. 

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Life operates similarly, you don’t know what you’re going to get, you just have to dive nose first into that bag. And that’s how kidnappings work, ladies and gentlemen. But, you don’t know if you’re going to get half a bag, or if you’re going to get a full bag, or if you find a rat inside…I mean, hey, it could happen. And with life, I guess you could find a rat inside you? Er. Life may give you rats? Er, I’d google that to see if it was a thing, but I’m a little frightened to.

*Googles Rats in people.*

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Never again. Back to the analogy. Some parts of life will feel more exciting and hot and hip than others. And then some may turn out dark and spooky, like a burnt cheeto, where it’s like 50/50 on whether you should try and eat it. I mean, like is it burnt? Or is it infected with something? Or maybe I should just go for it and ehhhhhhhhhhh. And of course, there’s the I’m-sick-of-life-since-I’ve-had-too-much-of-it-and-I-just-want-to-throw-it-all-away. That is a path we all must all go down when we reach for that second bag of Cheetos. ;-;

And of course, people are always going to be trying to steal your bag of Cheetos, interfering with you, taking control over it, nagging you to mow the lawn… Eesh. People. When that happens, you gotta defend those Cheetos man. WITH YOUR LIFE. CON TU VIDA. And yes, I’ve run out of analogies for Cheetos.

Thanks for listening.

Don’t find a rat in your Cheetos people.

-Alan

 

 

 

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One thought on “Hot Cheetoes Are My Life

  1. Pingback: Summertime Loving, Loving in the Summertime | Shadows of the Day

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